Lola Ismile

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So what’s the point in me being here? Why do I need to write?

Folks………let’s chat!

 

If you read my last post you will see that I gave a long list of who I am and what I do,  what I’m passionate about and so on.

 

Being a big law of attraction fan,  I am so aware that you can emit positivity and change life for yourself.  

Going through this journey myself,  I am going against everything I’ve been raised to believe.  The law of attraction,  or the Secret is famous for making the reference “ASK, BELIEVE, RECEIVE”.  Now were any of you told this when you were raised as a child? For sure I wasn’t!

 

Rightly, at the time,  I was told that life was hard, that we must work hard to get what we want.  Nothing about state of mind. 

Trying to be Miss perfect these days and practising my law of attraction perfectly,  I’ve put myself under huge pressure to be happy all the time and clever and witty and never get anything wrong…….this blog has been a long time coming.

Without expressing things in a normal, human way I am finding it is taking it’s toll on my body. Now let’s get real…..we are human, we have a human ego, we aren’t perfect and we can’t try and be either!

Even by setting the intention to write my first blog and get stuff off my chest has improved things with an ear problem i have right now! Only one day but you never know.  So this is my therapy.  

 

I used to trust everyone and love everyone..  I’m trying hard to accept that there are characters out there who are on different parts of their journey and are less lovely than others who are just adorable.  In other words,  I don’t understand the emotion of envy. 

I want EVERYONE to have a brilliant life,  to be happy,  to get all they desire.  Now, as for me,  I dont expect people to be envious of me either! ME? What is there to be envious of, jelous of, be nasty about?  I just don’t get it.

 

My lovely ex husband who is now one of my best friends said recently, “You leave the house all dressed up for work, with your fluffy dog under your arm and your good looking blonde kiddies,  get into your nice car and drive off happy with the music cheering you on…….who wouldn’t be envious?”

 

Maybe he has a point.

 

So, this year life has changed so much for me and I have noticed that I wasn’t trusting people in the same way as I was before. People would attack me out the blue for no real reason and I noticed I was retracting inwardly.

 

Fear of saying something negative,  failling in some way or generally not being the Law of Attraction goddess due to negativity, I was causing some “contrast” as they call it in the LOA world.

 

So now I’m here, shouting about my life, I’m proud of it and I’m proud of myself.  Not in some egotistical way at all. I’m just glad I’m me (most days) and I would honestly help out pretty much anyone with anything and NEVER EVER feel envy towards them.

 

I need to heal myself.  That’s the point of this blog.  Yes i live by the LOA but I’m still human and not perfect.  So I got a smaller car recently.  I wanted it.  I love it.  Can I put that on my email list of LOA subscribers? No, they will see that as failure.  But it’s made me feel so much better.

Divorcing my second husband this year wasn’t an easy decision.  Yet we are both so happy now and my goodness I’m totally in love with “baby” who’s the gorgeous man I feel I will marry really soon.  

Those who were judging me have made me go silent.  This is causing me ill health and I won’t go through life like that! SO I’m here, writing this totally knackered while also watching youtube (on my new Smarttv so clever!) and trying to find some inspiration about getting over my illness.

 

Candida,  what is that? Well it’s an overgrowth of bacteria we all have naturally.  It can evolve and grow into a yeast which causes all manner of illness.  Mine is now leaking through my gut and into my blood and it’s exhausting.  The way to get rid is complex.

Sugar, you need to give up all sugar,  including starches.  So the best thing is a high protein, low carb diet which of course is fantastic for the waist line too.  Problem is, with candida, they feed on sugar.  When you don’t give it to them, you crave it.  It’s bad news.  Like any addiction.  Takes a lot of willpower.

 

I just bought a brilliant product called “YEAST  raiders” from Holland and Barrat today which should help kill it off.  Die off is known to be another symptom as you get rid of it……which makes the symptoms worse initially.

I need to do this.  It’s tough.  I want to get it down low before my CT scan on sunday which is a scary thing.

 

OOOHHHHH so much going on right now.  My fingers have just done the talking and I’ve not changed any of this to make it perfect english or written in proper literature like Shakespere (oh look, a smilie) but I best sign off now and try to chill out ready for my Skype chat with Baby after he finishes work.  3 weeks today and we will be sleeeping in each others arms! I Can’t wait.

 

I’m so in love………..that, coupled with this blog surely has to be awesome therapy!

 

thanks for listening…….much love

 

Lola x


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Things you might not know about me….

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Hello there!!!

Welcome to my first blog post on WordPress! What a fantastic site :o)

I’ve lots and lots to say and thank you for coming over to be part of it.  As my tag line states,  my ‘ramblings’ are all about my own colourful thoughts and feelings.  I’m encouraging of positivity here and joy and love and smiles :o)

Let’s go on a wild journey together – why am I here?

Well,  I think I have a really interesting life.  People who know me in my everyday life seem to think I live an amazing life so I have decided to blog it!  I’ve so many subjects and so many thoughts pass through my crowded brain every day thinking, “I’d love to write that on my blog.”

Folks, I really want to open up here and not be subject to criticism  which according to spell check I can’t even spell!! HAHA so please go with the flow with me.  I want to tell you EVERYTHING,  no holds barred.

And watch for the LOLA Smiles book…….it’s coming……not all that soon as I’m working on 2 others as we speak.  Meanwhile….HELLO! Here’s some facts about me to get you started……..

please……….enjoy……

I am a woman!

I LOVE nature walks

I’m passionate about writing……I’m an author (yes, published tee hee)

I’m a dog lover (if only we could all love unconditionally)

My other job is a hair stylist (I’ve a few fans who say I’m fab! – Thanks guys)

Rainbows make me go all gooey

Pepsi max is my favourite drink in the world (hmm, debatable…)

I’m a cold person (temperature, not heart)

I’m not scared of flying,  I am scared of moths

I drive a VW, and will only ever drive a VW……

I live my life by the Law of Attraction (and teach it to others)

I’ve had my heart broken, but still open it up to love (thank GOD)

Currently in love with the most handsome Egyptian man (who is also in love with me thank GOD again!)

I’ve had 9 years of infertility, 12 miscarriages

Mum to fantastic twins

I’ve had IVF (did you guess that bit already?!)

Don’t like the phrase “regroup” but use it often as it makes sense!

I really LOVE some people

I’ve been bullied lots of my school life

I learnt to fight at the end of my school life :O) – that taught her!

I’m currently (right now) pondering if you can handle the news of my worst break up……maybe I’ll blog it in a few posts…it’s involving a transsexual incident

I’m a hippy

Jeggings are the best invention in my eyes

I’m a secret photographer (not takes secret photos – maybe I shouldn’t phrase it like that)

I can’t hear below 60 decibels – that’s classed as severely deaf

I have crohns disease

I have coeliac disease

I have a candida overgrowth

I eat from the Specific carbohydrate diet (takes guts!) LOL

I’m not a hopeless case,  just gotta sort myself out!

My dream is almost true now,  life is pretty fantastic!

I’m not afraid of flying, only when turbulence is bad that makes you go “oohh ehhh” along with the rest of the plane

I love Egypt……….

I’m very spiritual

I can’t dive because of my ears but I love to snorkel

I like keep fit (weights mainly)

Love swimming under water

Topped off with the jaccuzi (who doesn’t)

So, what else is there…….please ask me……I’m keen to let you know everything no holds barred……..come on over let’s chat!

Lots of love

Lola x